I know what you're thinking, "Two in one month? This can't be right! Someone is forcing her against her will and..." I'll stop you right there! It really is me, Kendall here! I have some updates that I thought I would share before they become way, way old news! I'm sitting here on this cold Staturday morning, in my robe and pajamas, (the usual everyday garb, after 5:30 p.m). Yes, on a nice day, if you drive by my house, you might catch me outside, moving the watering hose around in my robe, pajamas, and slippers. Yep, this lil' mama don't give a darn! That little snip should give you a clue as to the material you are about to read. I'm keeping it real. One thing that I think my students appreciate, in the classroom, is that I keep things real. I tell them how it is, how it's going to be, and we have a fantastic understanding. So, I'm going to do that with you! Here are some of the very REAL and BLUNT things that I've been experienceing lately, at 14 weeks pregnant. 1. I am NOT glowing. I've heard about the glow. I think I've seen the glow on other pregnant women. But the only thing I am radiating is the always has been, always will be oil pit that is still my face. (Thank you Perry genes.) 2. When hyderated, I need to pee very frequently. I am so thankful that at certain times during the day, I have a para in my classroom so I can sneak away to the restroom. My 5th hour kids have definitely caught on. "Class, we are going to go to lunch a couple minutes early today because..." *Students in unison* "You have to go to the bathroom!" Also, in the middle on the night, I will get up to pee anywhere between one and three times a night. THREE! 3. I am to the point in my pregnancy where I don't really know what's going on with my body. Am I showing? Am I chunky? Do I need to wear spanx under this dress to smooth out my back rolls? For those of you who know me and have seen me, you will understand. My torso is about six inches long. When I gain weight, you see it from my jowls to my thighs. So many times, I have joked that in my pregnancy prime, I will look like Viollet from the movie Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. To take me anywhere, Todd will have to roll me on my side, grab a stick, and engage in a rousing time of hoop rolling. I just know that by the end, I'll need to be juiced before I explode. I've added some pictures for visuals, down below... You'll see Todd and the neighborhood children practicing their hoop rolling skills, and then right, there is me waiting to be juiced. 4. POOPING, at times is extremely difficult. Miralax has become a very good friend of mine. And to quote Tom Hanks as the ever-lovable Forrest Gump, "That's all I have to say about that." (If you didn't read it in his accest, try again!)
5. And finally, along with the interesting changes my body is going through, my boobs have, and I'm not over-exagerating, have surpassed about 3000 pounds each. Sleeping, had become a bit of a difficulty. See, I like to sleep on my sides; however, when sleeping on either side, it's as if the extreme weight of my boobs, combined with the corresonding arm being flopped over my body, my shoulders and chest crumple inward in a way that causes some extreme back and shoulder pain, which after some sluething, I discovered could have been the cause of the four-day headache catastraphe. Anyway, I came up with a solution. I chose an extra poofy, yet smallish decorative pillow. When sleeping on my side, I place it up by my chest and neck. Really, I wedge it in between my boobs. That way, one boob is supported by the weight of the matress, the other, as well as my arm are supported by the poof of the pillow. Thus, no crumpling, no collapsing in on myself, and no back or headaches! I consider myself a genious! Todd on the other hand has let me know that it's...slightly annoying. "In order to sleep on my back, I have to lift the pillow and slide my arm under it." To which I reply, that is more than okay with me! As they come, I'll fill you in on more of the subtle updates... Again, for those of you who know me, you gave a little chuckle as, there is not much from me that comes across as subtle. Have a fantastic day, family and friends. -Kendall and Bean Comments are closed.
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WHAT IS THIS?Todd & Kendall both share their thoughts on this blog. Archives
September 2017
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